My life at collegebosylive.com

A trip of my own and Charlie's

2011-05-29T22:56:00.000-07:00

Well this week was absolutely fun for me and Charlie. Well after the stuff we had to do on Tuesday. Like cleaning, meeting, boi talk, and podcast with Zac me and Charlie loaded up and headed to Orlando. Head to make a short detour to take the guy I had over Jon to his house. So anyways after we dropped Jon off we got gas and was on i-4 to Orlando. I made pretty good time driving like ninety-five the whole way. We got to Orlando got settled in the hotel then went to Amy's to chill for a bit. Then came back to get ready for Pulse. Saw Jinx and Kai ja and other friends too. Charlie made out with drunk MATT. I talked with my future roommate about stuff. Then we got up and went home after getting food. Me, Charlie, Jinx, and Tyler chilled and smoked K-2 all night. the following day we slept most of the day got up rode around town. I took The boys out I stayed in. Just Jinx and Charlie came back though. We then went and got Kai ja and brought her over and we all smoked. We all were having fun laughing Kai ja and Charlie ended up doing stuff. Also gave Kai ja the other Britney ticker. She was so excited. Took everyone home then jinx and them left as well. Me and Charlie got the ok that Charlie does his chat from Orlando which was good so we stayed an extra night. So we went over to Rich's place. Thank god that Adam wasnt there didn't want it to be awkward. Well Charlie did his chat from there. He was all over Tom and even had Dakota come in and do somethings with lol. Charlie was just on a roll this week. Well I took Charlie and Dakota to Revolution and went back to hotel. I was suppose to hang with my friend but he never called. So later I picked up Charlie and as always Dakota would not shut the hell up. Got back and Kai ja wanted me to come to her place to chill and smoke k-2 so we did and watched the glee finale. Figured out that one of her roomies was a guy that wants to fuck me. He is deffinately a hottie. So i go back to the hotel get rest wake up pack up and check out. I make Charlie drive and we take Dakota home thank god lol. We drive back make good time enough time for me to get a nap, I do my chat and let everyone know I am not renewing and start laying it down real for people. When my contract is up I am moving to Orlando getting my own apartment with roomies though. Thats about ti this week Gay days next week.

Another Week.

2011-05-22T09:27:00.000-07:00

So this week has mostly been just me here even though I had a guest over. Yea I had the whole has to myself for three days this week. Zac, Vayne, Kenny, and Charlie all went on the CBL road trip to Tennessee to see Vayne's first boyfriend and love. I stayed behind for a few reasons. One it was going to be crowded in that SUV for a ten hour trip. Second I really didn't want to see all that drama go down Vayne having Kenny now and going to see Patrick that had to be drama in its self. Third Tennessee is where I live when I was sent to the boys home for 2 years of my life. I hate that state with a passion. That state brings back bad memories that I don't like to think about ever really. So Zac let me stay here. Well I had planned on going to Orlando for the days I was here by myself cause I had days off. However my plans fell through and I actually couldn't well I could, but it wouldn't have been much fun for me. So I stayed back and after chat on Wednesday I went and got my friend Mason. Mason has been here before he was a guy that David brought over here when he lived here. Apparently Mason didn't say anything, but found me attractive more the other guys, but was there with David so didn't say a thing to anyone. So when we decided to hangout this week. We came back here watched a few movies and went to bed. He started out cuddling then one thing led to another and we were playing. That's all me did though is play not anal sex was had between the two of us. After we cuddled and went to sleep. Woke up and then took him to work. Came back home cleaned up played games until time for Mason to get off went back and got him. We watched a few movies and stayed up late playing around not sexually just like tickling and stuff lol. Mason is a really sweet cute boy. He is fun to be around and has a great sense of humor and has a funny adorable laugh. Me and him on Friday went to the movies and watched Madea's Big HAppy Family it was soooo funny. I took him home came back. Me and Matty M went out to Ybor and had some fun at the club came back stayed up watching tv and went to bed. The boys all came back from there trip and told me about things they did. I had chat last night it was interesting Vayne came in and expressed himself about the drama with him and Jean about the whole aids thing. I expressed myself right back. I believe I got through to him cause he ended up apologizing to Jean and now they are starting over. One more piece of information that I got this week. Adam myt ex and ex cbl boy emailed me on facebook this week saying he missed me and thought of me often and was sorry that he hurrt me and how stupid he was for getting back with Matt. I ooked at the message laughed and deleted it didn't even respond I am over you Adam get over me.

From Whorelando to Trampa

2011-05-15T16:00:00.000-07:00

Ok so this week I did a lot of driving and I do mean a lot of it. I have been to Orlando and back to Ybor and to Clearwater twice. I will let you know why all the driving. So this week has been another busy fun week for me. I love having my car it lets me do so much to keep from going crazy. So anyways Me and my car took a trip to Orlando this week. Another one of my mini vacations. I went and stayed with my bestie Amy for those few days. I had off of chat Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday which means I used a vacation day. So I left Monday after I did all my cleaning and did my Podcast with Zaccie. I wasn't in this weeks Boi Talk either Zaccie let me skip it, however I did do everything else. So after I get there on Monday I got settled in and watched a few movies with Amy and we laughed and smoked (K2) and just chilled the rest of the night. Tuesday I believe I did a little bit of shopping had lunch with Amy at Olive Garden. Chilled the rest of the day at her place until she got home from work. We had a few drinks and smoked a little more and was laughing and fucked up beyond belief. Amy was laugh so hard she couldn't even talk or remember how to spell her own daughters name lol. Well after that night I slept in Wednesday me and Amy both did. I had lunch well a late lunch then was getting ready to go to Pulse with my friend Nesha. I go to the club first and see my friends and dance a little while waiting on Nesha. She finally gets there and I by her a few shots and we dance most of the night then come home eat and get ready for bed. That was the just of my few days in Orlando. I came back Thursday did my chat then got ready for Social with the boys had a ok time. Friday is where it gets nice and fun. I woke up Friday and went to get Matti. To clarify which Matti this is the same one that I always talk about and the same one that was apart of that drama with CJ. I bought him here got liquor for us and we started drinking. after chat I ended up picking up Matti and doing everything for him I even bathed him LMAO. I put his clothes on him and everything. So after we finally get Matti fully clothed and ready we head to pick up Matty M Zac's Matty. Charlie was DD as well I wanted to party for once. We go to Honey pot and have a good time just chilling come home and go straight to bed. Slept in Saturday because we were all drunk. Got up and started the day. Got more liquor for the night and we all played a drinking game in my chat. It was fun. Over all this week as been fun for me and the rest I believe Kenny is certainly spicing it up a bit. Well see you guys next week.

Fun and Productive week

2011-05-08T14:41:00.000-07:00

Well this week has been more fun and productive as the title to this diaries says. Well lets get down into whats happened this week. The Beginning pf the week was a little boring but that's cause no clubs are open or anything. My chats this week have been amazing I am getting my groove back into my dancing after i hurt my leg from doing the splits. I would have to say dancing is what I love to do it brings me joy and I entertain others. It also helps kept my body nice and in shape so that I dont have to do the whole workout thing ha ha. So anyways one night this week I did however had to leave at 4:30 in the morning on a night I had chat which means I broke curfew. I had a good reason, but Zac apparently doesn't believe which I don't care if he does or not I help a friend out that could have got behind a wheel of a car and died. So anyways what happen My friend called me I couldn't really understand him/ He said he was drunk and couldn't find his car can I come help him. I said yes and started to rush to go find him. I would have came back home but by the time I got there found him got him in the car and got him home it was 6:30 so i just put him in bed and crashed at his place. I cam back Zac was mad at me cause I at least didn't contact him I told him I was worried about my friends well being and not to check in. I told him I would take any punishment he wants to give since I did break the rules. I did fell that Zac shouldn't have gotten on me for curfew when he let Vayne stay over at his place on a night Vayne had chat and also had kitchen duties. Isn't the point of curfew so that we will be home on came for you guys to see us. Me and Charlie thought that wasn't right, but its no big deal cause I feel good about what I did for my friend. Well onto more of my week I did stay in on Thursday when the boys all went out. I am glad I did to cause apparently it was dead there according to Zac. So I just stayed in and watched tv. I have been watching a new show called Make It or Break It. Its a show kinda like Desperate housewives, but with teen gymnastics girls lots of drama and really good. However I didn't go out on Thursday I did go out on Friday. Me, Matty M, Charlie, and Vayne went to Honey Pot. I got my hair cut before going out to Honey pot that night as well. We got there and it was packed we got V.I.P that was cool. I danced all night and had one guy trying to get into my pants then the scariest part of the night. I had a stalker like a real one. My phone gets a text and its a number I don't know with a picture of a guy I had never seen. Well the guy says he is watching me dance. I looked around for him didn't see him. Then he kept on saying he is watching me and said he would be in the bathroom in 5 mins. I was so creeped out. What creeped me out the most is that he said he was going to follow me home. As i got closer to the house he asked me where Zac lived and did I want to hang there. It was scary as hell. Anyways me and Vayne went out for a bit last night wasn't to fun but had a good time anyway dancing for a bit. Thats been about all of my week here at CBL. Fun and productive. lets see what comes next week.

Deep Feeings

2011-04-30T23:57:00.000-07:00

So I wanted to make this dairy all about my feelings and what I have been feeling. As most of you know I recently had a hard time with the whole Adam thing. I tried to move on, but yet Tay gets hurt once more by someone I was trying so hard for showing a side you guys had not seen of me the romantic really soft side. I was waiting to say it in this diaries because it is tearing me up inside that I am getting hurt like this. I am starting to hate men actually hate them. If you wondering where all this is coming from I am about to explain it all to you. Most of you know I have been talking to and hanging out with a guy named Kyle Lambert that I really really was into and spent a lot of time and effort to showing him this. I put all my romance into doing things for him and after buying a bear and doing the romantic dinner a Zacs place with candles and roses with a home cooked meal that was a an amazing time with each other I go to ask him out after he leaves guess what I get in return. I get that I am not ready for a relationship, but I really like you a lot and love being around you. He says he wants to be single and that he should have told me this before but didnt cause he really liked me. I don't how to describe the way I felt when I read those texts from him. It hurt so bad cause out of everyone I have ever talked to and dated thas the first person I did something as big as the dinner for him. I am telling you guys this and as I type this I am hurting and having tears well up in my eyes. I feel stupid for thinking someone would appericate me and things I do. Whats worse is I don't know how to talk to someone in person about how I am feeling inside. I feel like holding it in and not showing it is best and letting it out is weakness and I can't do that right now I need to be strong for myself. Only thing is I really dont know how to anymore. There is so much built up inside of me that I have held in for so long that it's starting to effect me inside. I don't want pity from anyone although I know I will still most likely get it from people. I also know my 6 months here is getting closer to end. I want another 6 months here I need it to help me. I need to be here around people that care for me as much as some of the people do. Zac to he believes in us and wants us to do things that better us in life. He doesn't want us to fail. When the whole Adam thing went down I didn't have to say a word he came up and hugged me. I needed that more than ever and will keep needing that. I hope this show you guys a side of me I don'tt let out ever to anyone not my friends, family, boyfriends no one. So this is it for this week talk to you guys next week.

From GOOD to BAD!!

2011-04-24T10:22:00.000-07:00

So this week was mostly great and fun for me until the Saturday when DRAMA hit the sky for me. So let s jump right into everything that's happened to me this week. Well I spent Monday and Tuesday here at the house just relaxing and getting ready to go to Orlando. I have had many guys ask me out on dates so that's exciting for me I guess. Now for the record me and Adam broke up together not a one way street we decided to move on with our lives. So with that being said I had a guy come over that I have known for a while that finally ask me to hangout with him. So he came over we chilled with Vayne and Charlie. We smoked some k2 and then went to bed and watch a little bit of Devil wears prada. Then we finally went to bed. We cuddle and made out nothing hardcore happened. His name is Kyle Lambert or Raven Infiniti. He even looks related to Adam Lambert. The picture is of Kyle btw. So onto other things. I went back to Orlando this week Wednesday and Thursday for my days off. It was 420 so I went there for that. Me, Amy, and Andrea smoked k2 all day and relaxed. Thursday was good as well went to the pool and laid out for a while. came back and just chilled. I did hangout with another guy that wanted to do something. He was cute but not dating material just good friend material. Friday came so I had to rush home for chat and get ready to party cause my friends were coming over. We got liquor and played beer pong got in trouble with the police all in all it was a great night Friday. Now for the Drama. Saturday came and Adam was to guest chat at 7 boy did he surprise us all and hurt me most of all. He had ex cbl Matt with him. You know the one that called all the members nasty old perverts. The one who said nasty things about Adam. He brought HIM of all people into chat. They had sex. The members were mad that i was even in chat but I would have seen or heard it either way. Now I don't care that he is with MAtt or whoever what I am upset is that he doesn't live here anymore at all so he doesn't have to see me or who I am dating fucking etc... He choses to come to CBL. On the other hand I do live here and have to see nad here and constantly be reminded of stuff I dont want to. Now even though we broke up it still hurts that he would do that. He even sent me a email on facebook saying he had to delete me cause he could handle seeing guys hit on me that it hurt to much. So why would he do that to me. I will be fine don't you worry but karma is a bitch and it will get you Adam. So I finish my chat and head out to Ybor with everyone. Me and andrea both get tattoos Andrea wanted to cheer me up so she bought them. LOVE HER. Thats it for this week guys see you next week. please email me if you would like to talk.

I have to move on

2011-04-17T09:53:00.000-07:00

So this week brought me sadness more than I thought it would. It also brought me fun and a refreshing mini vacation. So lets get right into what has happen to me this week. As everyone knows and most likely feels the same as I do about it. Adam left Tuesday around noon. It was really hard to watch him leave me, but we both knew it was for the best because he wasn't happy here and we wasn't working out so no reason for him to stay. He said I was the only reason he stayed as long as he had in the first place. So he left and it was really hard I almost cried, but I was strong and pushed on. After Adam left I started getting things together to go to Orlando of a mini three day vacation. So I get everything ready before I headed to get my friend from Clear water to go with me. Yes the friend was my Mattie he came with me. No he wasn't my date and no we didn't do anything besides just sleep in the same bed. We jammed out to Britney's new album Femme Fatale all the way there. Finally get there to my friend Amy's house. Most everyone knows Amy she was the girl that came and got me the first time I left. So we was going to go out but decided to stay in and rest from all the driving. We drank a little bit smoked k2 watched movies and went to bed around 4. Get up the next day do a little shopping at the mall and eating and come back and start getting ready to go to out to Pulse. I dress my best friend up Andrea amy's Daughter. We finally get there start mingling with my friends and dancing we stay til like 2 in the morning then leave go home and have fun. We had so much fun laughing and hanging out. Next day we get up and decide to head to the beach. We go get drinks and food before leaving. Get there tan and just relax. We leave to go home and get ready for Revolution. We have fun I got to see all my friends we leave go home to get rest before I had to come back. I get back after dropping off Mattie. So coming back was so hard to do. As soon as I walked in I felt so sad I knew Adam wasn't going to be here but it was finally real that I would be here without him. I did cry a little bit in chat but thats it. I try to be strong for myself so I can move on. So I did my chat and me Charlie and Vayne went to Ybor to go out. We had loads of fun came back and just chilled. Saturday was relax day for me and thats about it. I will see you guys next week

Time marches on.

2011-04-10T08:49:00.000-07:00

Well this diary is going to be filled with bad news as most of you already know what is going on. So lets not beat around the bush. Adam has put his one week notice in to Zac. Yes Adam is leaving today which is Sunday is his last chat. Adam has decided to move on even though we really dont want to break p and leave each other. We both feel that it is best at this point to break up and move on with life and remain friends. Now with that being said let me say this to the gossip column. If me and Adam never dated Adam said he would have left a lot sooner than this. He told me that the only reason he was still here was cause I was his. Now that clears that up. So we talked and figured we really like each other but are just so different in where we want to go in life. So as mature adults me made our decisions and I hope everyone can respect that. Adam leaving will definally be hard for me especially. I plan on this week when he leaves taking a vacation day. I will prob go up to Orlando and chill for a bit. Now on other funny news this week I ran my car in the ditch and had to have Adam get it out for me after a deer ran out in front of me. I know most of you dont believe me but I am telling the truth. So we didn't think we were going to get it out and on top of all that there were two cops siting there watching us. We did finally get it out nothing majorly wrong with her just few bumps and scraches. We also had our group photo shoot that I thought came out fantastic. I hope you guys enjoy them. Well this week will be had for me cause I wantedto go home to see my mom for her birthday and my sister as well one April 16 and the other April 17th. Sadly I can't go not enough money to get there and back. Anyways this week was just a drama filled week and I am glad its over. See you guys next week everyone just know I will miss Adam every much. =(

Wonderful Week.

2011-04-04T11:56:00.000-07:00

So this week has been exciting for the most part here at the house. Well first off we will talk about all the fun and things me and Adam did at the Spa and Resort Adam said at for his little mini vacation. So Adam got a 2 night stay at a Spa and resort. It's not a bathouse. A member bought it for him. If you reading this MEMBER THANK YOU. SO I take him to the place and he gets checked in and I leave. I had to do the BoiTalk with Vayne and guest Vayne's now ex boyfriend Josh5. In this weeks BoiTalk we talk to Vayne and Josh5 about all the things they did together and what they were going to do. We also found out what made they attracted to each other. Well as everyone should know by now that they are no longer in a relationship. SO after BoiTalk and pod cast I went and spent 2 hrs with Adam before chat. Had a few drinks and got to see around before leaving. I did chat that night then after Zac let me break curfew to go be with Adam. Well if you didn't know why we was at the Spa it was from a member to Adam to be able to relax and get away. His mom passed away 6 months ago and her birthday was during that time so it was hard for him. So we stayed up drinking and laughing. We went and got in the hot tub for a bit it was great. Well the next day we got up and went out to do things. Well first off we got our couple's Swedish massage which was fabulous. Then we did a little fishing and then came the storm which I loved. Well as the day ended I went home and let Adam relax. I did chat and went to bed was woke up by hell and had to let meow meow in. We and Adam took Bree for a mud ride down back rodes which was really fun. Well now we have Charlie here and so far it has been good. I hope it stays this way.

All that MAGIC!!!

2011-03-27T13:24:00.000-07:00

So this week has been absolutely busy for me and Adam. Are week was completely filled with all sorts of things. Like our second trip to Orlando only this time we were gong to Disney World with Rich. We also went out to Mr. Sisters a new and happening club in Orlando. So both of these places were my first time going to. So this week started off with me and Adam getting up and heading to Orlando after his chat on Tuesday. By the way this would be our second time going to and from Orlando in my new car and she head up and did great. GO BREE!!!!!!!!! aha. Since it was so late in the evening the interstate wasn't quite as busy as usual so we got to Rich's house pretty fast. I did like 90 all the way there speed devil. Visiting Rich's was also another first. His house was nice he showed us around and all the things he had. NOTES: that Rich has a lot of very interesting things. So we chilled for a bit before heading out to the club. We get there and its so nice and cool. We chilled and danced a bit mingled a n\bit then headed home to Rich's house. Somehow every time I am around Rich I seem to get into the most random conversations that are really cool facts, but have no place for it in what we are doing. So we get some rest not much I might add because me and Adam didn't go to bed until 3 am. We get woken up by Rich at 8 in the morning. KILL ME!! We have waffles and apple wood bacon yummy. Get ready and head out to Disney World. We hit three parks out of the whole thing. First stop was Epcot. Now Epcot was just BEAUTIFUL. The rides were ok and fun. They were not that like fast and scary. Adam wanted to drink around the world but we thought that might not be a good idea since we had 2 more parks to go. So we did a few things at Epcot then we caught the bus over to Hollywood Studio's where my favorite ride out of the day was. We walked around and Rich was telling us about the history of Disney and things until we were ready to get on the first did at that park. We decided to go on the Hollywood Tower of Terror first. Adam didn't get on it because he can't handle rides that free fall like that. So it was just me and Rich. We get in line which was like only 5 minutes long get seated and the ride started. Now this ride is dark and scary so I am holding onto Rich like the glitter queen I am haha. We get to this really dark space and stop. Next thing I hear was like a clank sound and then down we went I screamed so loud but not as loud as Ben. We get off and do the Rockin Roller Coaster the one by Aerosmith. That was a fun and exciting ride.That was the only to we rode at that park. So we hope on the bus to the ticket place and ride the Monorail to the Magic Kingdom. Now this was my fav park out of them all just didn't have my Favorite ride which was the Tower of Terror. I was so excited to see the castle haha. Of course I would be excited to see the castle. I didn't get to see any Princesses up close. So we rode all the good rides there. Then came the most Magical moment of all the firework show. It was so gorgeous to watch. a 13 hr day of walking in the heat tired us all the hell out. Overall though it was a great time. we go back to Rich's take a nap and head back to the house. We find out Vayne has a date which I am very happy for him. Oh wait they are boyfriends YAY!!!! So we get to meet him and he seems really cool. Lord Vayne was telling me all his dirty things they did. EWWWW. Thats pretty much my week. See you later guys. =)

Fun and Drama

2011-03-21T21:12:00.001-07:00

So this week has been a extremely intense and exciting week to say the least. Finally got everything working with the car and the stereo put in. Its running good made a few trips to Ybor in it to make sure it can take it. Guess what? It made it there and back. So this Friday me and Adam went to Orlando for the night and day. We went to hang with my old roommates. We just sat around laughing and talking about things we did. It was good seeing them been awhile since we have been able to hangout together. So me and Adam got a hotel that night and just chilled together. We had sex that night as well it was really amazing for me. Well it being Spring Break for almost everyone almost all the nice hotels were booked or sold out. So we ended up staying at a scary ghetto hotel. The blinds fell off the wall while I was trying to close them. Thats how bad it was. So the next day we get up and get ready go to my friends house to get them up so we could go to the beach. I get there and they went out the night before my friend is sitting inside with sunglasses on smoking a cig with a hangover. All she could say when I walked through the door was oh god I have a hangover and laughing. I miss them haha. So takes a few to get everyone up and ready to go but we do. So we get to Cocoa Beach pretty fast from Orlando. Find a spot and get settled. So for spring break there are a lot of Old people that were on that beach. It was so freaking hot out that day. So I put on tons of sun screen. I still get burnt, but not from being on the beach but from the sun coming in through my window while I am driving that's how bad the sun was that day. Me and Adam had a blast. We drive back after dropping off one of my friends. Ugh the drive was so horrible after being on the beach all day. So me and Adam got into pretty bad other night. Well we are over it now but it was intense. We where just having a few personal problems and Adam being so down this month because of his mother didn't help it. Its all good now though we got through it thank god. This next week is already booked so come see what all we do this week on Sunday. See you guys later.

A Up and Down Week

2011-03-13T19:30:00.000-07:00

So this week has been such a roller coaster its not even funny. My week is just been like a good and bad thing. So lets start with what has been going on this week. This week has mostly been about getting my car and the money to get everything taken care of. So my week started off looking for a car and trying to find something I actually liked that looked good for the price range I was in. So we spend most of the week actually going and looking for the car and test driving a few cars. Finally find one that I like that I can pay for. So we go the next day and put the money down sign the papers and pull off the lot. I was so excited to have my car and to show it off. Well the next day the car stops working on me which we thought it was gas so we put gas in it. Well guess what that wasn't it. It was actually the fuel pump. So we had the people that sold us the car come tow us and fix it. Well they charged us the wholesale amount on the parts and didn't charge us for labor so we was pissed that the car broke down less than 24 hrs after we bought it but we took what we could get. Well everything seemed to be working until it broke down again Saturday night. The tension belt went on it so we was pissed again. So we had to tryh and get it home without blowing out anything which we did. So we are taking it back this week and trying to work something out. Well on other news something good actually. Adam got me a gift for the car that I absolutely love. It was a new stereo to put in my car. The stereo does a lot it can do bluetooth work with a ipod or iphone it has a USB port to it. Its really nice. Adam is so sweet to me =). We also got new phones today. Both of us got new android phones. Mine is purple and I love it. Adam got a new PS3 with games so we have been playing that. Oh just found out that Charlie has been accepted and will be coming in April. The house is now full. Cant wait to see what will happen in the next few months to come. See you guys next week.

Exciting Week

2011-03-06T19:20:00.000-08:00

So this week well...was one of the most interesting weeks since I have been back to CBL. We had the new app Charlie ex-Florida Dude as well and also TwinkCharlie that comes into chat. We Had the visit to the Aquarium as well. We went out two nights in a row with everyone both nights. Adam and ex cbl David fighting. I got most of my money from my mom to get my car this week as well. Well lets got into detail of this week and all the things it brought for us. The new App Charlie a.k.a TwinkCharlie and Ex-Florida Dude. He came in on Wednesday with Rich. Rich picked him up from the Tampa airport. He is really cool and very mature which is something we all like. We don't know what Zac will do. Don't know if Charlie even wants to stay. I think he would make a good addition to the house. On to more exciting things lol just kidding. Well we went to the Florida Aquarium in Tampa also this week. We got to see the very small collection of fish they ad. We did find out we could dive with the fish for only 85 dollars which is cool. So me and Adam are going to go back soon and dive with them. So we got to go out with everyone on Wednesday. Rich, Fluffy, Adam, Charlie, Zac, Vayne, and me all went out to Gbar. We met Ben there as well. Well all had a great time dancing and the ones that could drink were drinking. Well the night ended kinda bad when David decided to run his mouth to a drunk Adam. Next thing you know Adam had punched David in the face and was being tackled by the bouncer. Adam was threw out so we all went outside to check on him and make sure he was fine. So needless to say most members will e happy that David got what he deserved. Zac actually told Adam that he wished he got more hits in. So I am getting closer to getting my car and I am so freaking excited. My mom sent me most of my money this week so all I got to do is find a car worth buying and go get the car registered and insurance put on it. So other than that my week as been great see you guys next week.

BLAH!!

2011-02-28T01:15:00.000-08:00

Another semi boring week here at CBL. This week had a little more in store for us than last week seeing how we didn't even go out last week. This week had the Meeting as always. Well I am still looking for a car that I would want to look into. Yes my mom is sending me money to get a car. Adam is going to help me pick one out since he is good with cars and things like that. After I get the car insurance and tag I will be going out way more and doing a lot more. Also when I get a car I plan on getting a job. Going out on Thursday us usual and doing things like we always do on Sunday. Well we got to see Ben this week. He came to get the rest of his things from the house. He cut his hair. THANK GOD! We also got to meet Towner. Towner is a member that we get to chat with. So it was nice to meet another member. We had cleaning and our meeting Tuesday. Also got gifts from Briefs and a gift from someone else. Well Briefs sent us a number of things. He sent use shirts. He also sent us so like notebooks, folders. and paper to help with the GED. Well along with briefs gifts someone else sent us a GED study book. We are all going to study and take the test together. Well Thursday was absolutely wonderful and fun. I got to go and dance my little ass off. I got to see all my friends. Adam had fun to. I guessing that's cause he was so drunk he couldn't even walk. Now we have another Matt to add to the list. We got to meet Zac and Vayne's new friend Matt. So we got to come up with a name for this Matt. Anyways we also visited Ben at his job. Well Rich hasn't been here in 2 weeks I believe. Last time he came was when we went to the fair. He has been taking care of his new dogs. I think he is coming this week though which will be great. Another person that is coming here not to just visit though Twink Charlie from chat and is a ex Florida Dude from what have heard anyways is coming here to app. So we will see how that goes. Well guys I have no more to say about this week so I will see you guys next week. Lets hope its more interesting than the past 2 weeks.

Moved on.

2011-02-20T13:49:00.000-08:00

Well this week is kinda a downer seeing is how we lot a cbl boy. Yes Ben's contact is finally up and he isn't renewing either. So that means Ben has moved out. Great thing is Ben just moved to Ybor. So we lose a boy ,but we knew he was leaving. So time to move on and get another fun guy in here. Funny thing is Zac told me that ex-cbl-Josh applied again did the whole application. Zac told me he doesn't know why he wasted his time. We do have another guys that have applied just got to talk to them and make sure they are interested in coming and being apart of the CBL group. We have such a good group here now. Zac said this is one of the best groups he has had in a long while. We all get along and have fun TOGETHER. So lets move on to some of the things we have did this week that is worth talking about. Well as you know we usually have the house meeting and cleaning on Tuesday. Well we had to move both to Wednesday. Because Zac didn't get back in town until late that evening so we just decided to do it Wednesday. So we got up started the meeting then started our cleaning. Ben was cleaning and packing his room. Ben paid both Adam and Vayne to clean something for him so he could finish his packing and cleaning. Well we was also waiting on Rich and Tom to get here. Rich and Tom was taking us to the Fair. So after we got everything in order cleaned to Zac standards it was off to the Fair. So Rich and Tom paid for us to get in. The FAIR IS EXPENSIVE!!!!! 20 dollars for 20 tickets and each ride is 4 to 6 tickets. I did two rides there well one wasn't even a ride just a glass maze. The other one was one scary ass ride scared me and Ben to death. Well me and Ben were the only ones brave enough to get on it. All I heard was Ben screaming loudly like a little girl. After we get off Ben lights up TWO cigs at the same time and starts to smoke them both. LOL!!! Well the good thing is that me and Adam got to take pictures with real live seals and real live Macaws the birds. Well other than that this week was been pretty laid back. We didn't get to go out Thursday so nothing to say about that. So I will talk to you guys next week. =)

A Calmer Week

2011-02-13T19:49:00.001-08:00

This week has been a little calmer for the most part. We haven't really done to much this week. Its going to be weird cause this is Ben's last week here with us. It is good that he isn't moving to far just down to Ybor. So we will be able to see him when we go out. We had Rich come down this week. We all went to play mini golf except for Ben he had to work. I didn't come in last place this time yay. It was a very nice day hot enough to sweat. Zac and Adam did the go kart racing thing while the rest of us played arcade games. Thursday night is our usual go out to the clubs night. It was really weird at the club that night none of us were really feeling the club vibe that night. It was like it was all new people none of t he regulars. So that night was kinda a bust meaning it wasn't fun. Like I said this week has been really boring besides the mini golf. Well again we are still getting applications for new boys and I think i have the perfect guy too. He looks really fun for CBL. He lives close to so it wont be hard to get him here. This is my shortest diaries ever and I am sorry guys. Catch me next week.

Better and Better!!!

2011-02-06T20:58:00.000-08:00

Okay this week has been very exciting and filled with fun. I don't even know where to begin. well the start of the week ended up being extremely hot for me and Adam. I had anal sex for the first time since i have been back. It was extremely hot and intense. Even though i was sore the next day it was still great. I had waited a whole week teasing him. Well Tuesday Rich came down from Orlando and we all went out to Gbar. It was Adam's first time out at the club with us. It wasn't that fun kinda dead so we just sat around talking and them drinking. We had waffle house afterward. Next day we decided to go play mini golf. It took us forever just to get to the freaking place from all the stops we had to make. We finally get started playing golf well I came in LAST place lol. Second hole I knocked the ball into the water. It was a fun game to play with everyone. After playing golf we went into the arcade and played a few games. Well the day before Adam was accepted. It kinda had everyone on edge because Zac usually gives hints if he is going to accept someone but not the case this time. I am thinking it has to do with he was worried that me and Adam was getting so close and he didn't want a house with that kinda drama. Well that was some of the big news of this week. Thursday was club night it was 10 times more fun than Gbar on Tuesday. We danced all night they got drunk Vayne made out with Josh1. We all came home and didn't sleep all freaking day really. We stayed up all night just talking about everything. Finally got some sleep. Well I ended up getting a little sick and missed chat. Guess what? Adam got sick the next day running a fever of 101. I think we can thank Fluffy for bringing it lol. Saturday was just a regular lazy day for me since I had basically no sleep all day Friday. Zac's back today so we hang out with him and stuff. We played a few games and had some food and just laughed. I believe that pretty much sums up my week here. It just keeps getting Better and Better!!!!!!!!

Better and Batter!!!

2011-02-06T20:50:00.000-08:00

A NEW CBL!!!

2011-01-30T21:43:00.000-08:00

Well this week at CBL has been so much fun for me especially. CBL is starting to gain its fun life back as it did before. Me and Ben have been the only 2 here since David was booted out by Zac. So its been kinda quite and relaxing. That all changed this week When new app arrived. The new apps name is Vayne and he looks like a mini Zac. Vayne however is different and full of life and energy. He cam this Thursday the day he turned 18. So we through him a party to make him feel special as he is special. Vayne is a great person and I really like him and enjoy seeing him be so different. We had cake and trick candles that was so funny to watch Vayne try and blow out. Then we all got ready to head to the clubs for his first night out to a club ever. Needless to say we got there and he forgot his id so they dropped me Ian and Noah off to go back to get it. I had a amazing time that night and apparently so did Vayne which is great I see more good times at the club in his future. So Friday finally here and another app to go pick up. Adam is the name of this app. Adam is the ex bf of ex CBL Matt that walked out calling CBL members perverts. Remember him?? Well appears some of the stories that Matt was telling everyone about his ex wasn't true. Adam is really sweet good looking guy and is really cool as well. So we get him settled in and then the fun starts for the night after Zac leaves. We start drinking and playing drinking games. Everyone is getting drunk quickly. Vayne starts talking to coke bottles and himself in the mirror. He even starts looking for Dahvie the Blood on the dance floor band member under beds. He then moves on to kissing all over Ben and Adam. Well Vayne gets more from Adam in Adams chat thanks to them both being really drunk. So that night was extremely fun and interesting to see what Vayne is like drunk. I got videos as well. Since that night I have come to really like Adam me and him click really well. He makes me smile, laugh, and blush a lot. I know you guys are probably wondering what happen to My Matt. He has decided he wants to just be friends. He told me he would rather stay friends and not ruin that cause he wouldn't ever want to lose me I am to good to lose to something that could happen if we got together. I was a little bummed, but I understand. I wouldn't want to lose him either so we agreed to be friends for now. I am really glad that Vayne is accepted and I hope Adam is too. That's all I can say about this week that is hopefully the start of a new and much more exciting CBL.

WOW...is all I can say.

2011-01-23T13:20:00.000-08:00

So this week as been totally and completely crazy to say the least. Well basically to start off the week David has been kicked out by Zac. Yea Zac kicked him out for his attitude about doing things he is suppose to do. Now a lot of the members think its just because he didn't clean the kitchen and its not that. He was kicked out for talking to the BOSS like he did. I fully understand why Zac kicked him out and agree with him. Ben gets in trouble for not cleaning, but he doesn't give a attitude about it he gets up and does whatever it is he was suppose to do. So of course when David got kicked out we started hearing things from people that David was talking shit about CBL and Zac. Things like CBL is losing business and going to close down and that Zac steals money from the boys. David even tried talking a app out of coming which he didn't count on me talking to the guy and getting him to reconsider. Moving on from David and to Ben. Ben has decided that he won't renew when his contract is up in a few weeks. I think David had a little to do with his decision, but that's just my opinion. Ben also was broken up with other day so he is dealing with that. I will be sad to see Ben leave, but that gives us a chance to get more guys in here that are really outgoing. We have 2 apps coming already and they both seem to be really out going. One of the apps coming is turning 18 the day he comes so it will be a little party for him. The other app coming is the ex-Boyfriend of ex-cbl boy Matt that left cbl cause of his "boyfriend". Well I have talked to his boyfriend and his boyfriend said that he never said anything like that. He said Matt was the one saying that stuff and that Zac was kicking him out and had no place to go. So we will have to find out the info on that story. Now onto more exciting stuff. I finally got to give my gorgeous Mattie his gift. He loved it very much. So we got drunk at the club, and danced almost all night along with making out with each other. So things are looking good for me and him so I hope things go further. He said he really wants to come here and visit so thats a good sign that he doesn't mind me doing this. Well guys thats all I have this week see you next week. =)

A sick week.

2011-01-17T14:13:00.000-08:00

Well this week has been horrible for me. I have been sick for almost all of it what a bummer for me. So the sickness started late Wednesday night and got worse from there. I had a fever of 103.5 one night I was so miserable and wanted to just sleep forever. This week has been kinda of a blur I dont remember most of it cause of being sick. So this Thursday we was suppose to go out but didn't get to cause of a stupid bomb threat in Zac's apartment complex so they had the whole place block. Zac couldn't leave at all. I had company that night though so I wouldn't be bored. well he came over in a hoodie and glasses to be unnoticed lol. Some of you guys knew who he w as first off and others didn't. Well the guy was Mattie. Mattie as in ex-cbl boy and ex cbl manager Mattie. He is going to be coming around a lot more to hang with me. Well on another note you guys all know who JT is. Well other night i am laying in my bed and JT climbs in my bed and starts feeling on me. I asked JT 3 times to get out he finally does and is all pissy that I didn't sleep with him. Next day he apologizes and I ask do you think I am a slut?? He says to me I wouldn't call you a slut I would call you lucky to have me. I told he i have standards. I believe he is like a another Cj thinks he could have everything he wants. He makes me sick. So I am hoping very soon in the next week or so my mother send s my money to get me a car so I can finally go do things. Well I dont have much more to say se you g uys next week.

WOW...What a week!!!

2011-01-11T23:16:00.000-08:00

Well this week has been very busy for me. I have been going non stop since I have been back to CBL. If I am not doing something with Zac then I am doing stuff around the house. Anyways I know I mentioned this in chat and in my video dairies that well me and Jayy the guy from Blood on the Dance Floor aren't talking anymore which kinda sucks because I liked him. Oh well boys come and go like always. Come to think of it last few guys have been this way. I think I need to stop being so nice and sweet to these guys and play hard to get. So onto to other news. I hoping in a couple of weeks I will be able to get my car with money my mother is sending me. If i get the car then I will be able to so much more here and be able to maybe find a guy better. So me and Zac have started to work out in the mornings together. I am aiming to get my body in shape and toned before summer. Thats my goal right now better body for the summer. Well you guys have noticed a difference in me since I have been back. I have change and matured in just a short period of time. I am back to being fun and loving like I used to be. You guys have seen that I now get up early and start my day off doing things with Zaccie. I don't lay around the house or sleep past noon anymore. So another new piece of news is I got a TATTOO this week or rather last week. I got a tattoo on my lower back. The tattoo is of a star with a music note in the middle of it and it looks amazing. The place and design fits my personality as well as my body. If you guys are wondering why I chose it then its because I love music and dance as everyone knows. Stars are one of my favorite things cause I feel like ab star shining in my on way. If anyone is also wondering what is going on with me and Mattie thats not the ex manager either. Well I talk to him,but not sure where me and him stand. I am not sure in Mattie is interested or not. He could just be playing hard ti get cause it hard to get any vibes from him like that. Well I am not sure that there is much more to say about this week. I look forward to the next 6 months here. Love all you guys.

I'M BACK!!!!

2011-01-03T18:57:00.000-08:00

So guess what people I'm back at CBL and I couldn't be happier. I have Been in Orlando since I left and been doing great. I got a job even though they wasn't working me much I still was working. I got to go out and party with my friends and roomies. I had my Birthday while I was gone on the day after Thanksgiving. It was really fun got drunk and danced and just was myself. Well I was kinda missing it here so I called Zac and asked him could I come back. He told me that he would ask the members and the boys and see what their thoughts were. So I didn't know they answer yet. I came down to visit the thursday before Christmas and was told 2 days later that if I could put the bed in my old room together I could be a CBL Boy again. It was so hard putting that thing together so many parts and no instructions on how. I met the app who was really weird and different but I had to give him one thing he could sing and play the guitar. So I have been here having fun and being more productive during the day. I get up earlier and do things. Well my bad luck with boys continued when they first night i came back to visit Josh2 came over. Well we talked, cuddled, and played around. I liked him. Well after that night he was sick for a week and I checked on him every day even invited him over so I could take care of him. Finally the day he gets better I invited him over and he tells me he has plans with his ex. What a bummer so Josh2 was out. I am still friends with Mattie just in case you guys don't know which one I am referring to it's the boy me and CJ fought over. Well when I cam e back me and him made out at the club one night and I figured I would go after him again. Well that is harder said than done cause either he isn't interested or playing really hard to get LOL. Well 2010 was coming to a end and we made plans to have a party here at the CBL house. The plans changed cause of our friends Blood on the Dance Floor couldn't make it out here but invited us up there. I was so looking forward to meeting Jayy lead vocalist of the band. Well all is alright and then the Zac car breaks what a Bummer right so we all spent the New Year home. On the bright side of that Jayy tweeted me his number and I was talking to him and got him to agree to letting me and Zac come get him. So my first impression of him was he is kinda mean , but I soon found out he actually liked me and thought I was beautiful and just didn't know how to act around me. That made me feel really good about myself. I ended up staying at Zac's that night with Jayy we Cuddled and watched movies even kissed. He was really sweet and romantic kissing my shoulders and lips and his hands never even went pass my waist. So I guess I am talking to Jayy now cause he actually shows interest in me. This weekend was the best and most tiring in a long time. THIS NEW YEAR IS GOING TO BE GREAT I CAN SEE IT!!!!!!

Whoa!! What a Week.

2010-09-26T17:54:00.000-07:00

Well this week as been very drama filled as have the past few weeks. Since CJ has arrived it has not been the same to say the least. CJ certainly mixed things up around here in CBL. Well lets dive in to my week and let me lay it out for you guys. So I have decided to give my two weeks noticed into Zac as you all know I made the announcement on Tuesday night in my chat. Now its official I am leaving after I told Zac on Wednesday during the meeting. Guys don't worry this isn't the last you will see of me I am leaving on good terms so I will be doing guest chats and still coming down to CBL every now and then. I am going back to live in Orlando with my best friend and to live a life that isn't as boring everyday and I can actually do something everyday. So lets talk about why I am leaving now my reason is actually something I am going to stand by whether people agree or not its not their choice and they don't know how it makes me truly feel. So okay guys this is what went down from the past week and a half. I have been talking to this guy named Matt and have been for about two weeks. Well the other week when me and Cj went out together he was coming there to meet me and dance. So I was the polite guy and introduced him to Cj. Well that Thursday after Cj went to home after the bathouse back to Orlando he apparently hung out with Matt at the club cause he saw him. CJ also gave him his number and made the effort to talk to him more than a friend. So when Cj comes back Sunday that week he tell me he is just going to hang with him that's it. Well he lied to me cause I found out he went on a date with him. So this is where I am mad and pissed. A "friend" isn't suppose to go after a guy you are interested in in any way shape or form. So Cj in his defense says well you haven't even been talking to him that long. Well my response is that it shouldn't matter if i was talking to him for a day a friend isn't suppose to go after him knowing I like him. So some of the members want to say that I did the same thing to been but I didn't its not the same at all. What happened between me and Cj was just sex. Ben had his chance and chose to answer a call form a ex that he said he doesn't even like. If Ben wanted CJ so bad he wouldn't have answered. Now back to what I was saying some of the members agree with me and some don't. So this week ended me finding out that Matt told CJ to basicly get lost cause from what Matt told me he saw what Cj was doing and isn't into games. Well this why I am leaving and its not cause of cbl its because I don't think i could live in the house with him without it being soooo intense. So besides that thats all I can say about why I am leaving. Well we recently had a app named Effrian. He was super cool and fun. He got into cbl very quickly adn wasn't that shy about it. I am hoping he makes the cute but if not I will def stay in contact with him. So there you have it guys my week of DRAMA once again.

A better week,

2010-09-19T20:21:00.000-07:00

This week has been better for sure. It started off boring, but it got better on Tuesday. Me and CJ went out together to G bar to have some fun because of being bored. We asked the others if they wanted to go Ben said no and Robbie was said sure if you want to carry me to the car after my chat so we thought that was a no. so we left apparently he was kiddingand really wanted to go. Well nedless to say he deffinitly over reacted about the whole thing. I thought he was being really childish but he had is own fun giving Ben his first facial. Well me and Cj met ex cblDakota at the club. he was a very interesting person. I will say one thing he did not shut up at all. Well as the night goes on dakota signs me up for the Strip contest which Ididnt really feel like doing but did it anyways. Well I won it eventhoughI thought for sure I wouldn't. I got a $100 bar tab in which I couldnteven use. Well that was until Dakota took me to the bathroom and gave me his 21 band so I could drink. I drink a good bit before I left enough to get me tipsy. We got home and went to bed, I slept ok that night but had bad nightmares. So as you guys alll know there is no more Colby. Colby won't ever be back because he cares more about what his friends think of him and not what he feels for me. I have to say I am still sad that I don't get to be with him anymore but I guess I dont really need someone like that anyways. So I have been talking to another guy and I hope it goes somewhere if not thats ok. Well Wednesday was a big day and the house was totally full. We had the new app in and he is really cool. His first night here was a blast they got drunk and wrestle all over the place. We had a amazing time at waffle house afterwards. Well I knew we had to be up at 10 the next morning to do podcast before we headed to the bathhouse for our photoshoots. Well because of Cj and Eff I didnt get to sleep until after 6. So at 10 when I got up I was beyond tired. SO we spent all day at the bathhouse doing photoshoots walking around town shopping. Well I was last to chat that night at 10 while everyone else headed to the club without me. When I got finish I went and danced my night away til like 2 we all packed up and left. We went to waffle House for food and then to hoe after 4 I didnt get to bed until 5. So because of the lack of sleep I was extremely sick on Friday. I hated the feeling. I had to even give up the rest of my chat to Ben because of how awful I was feeling. I took medicine for it and pasted out. Well Saturday I felt a little better and got to hang with garrison the guy Cj likes. Now for everyone to know CJ gave my number to Garrison so he could come hangout cause he was bored. Well me and Garrison ended up going to go get food cause we were hungry. Well that ended up being a big ole mess. Cj was over reacting about it and it just caused unwanted dramam for all 3 of us that I was not cool with. Well I am glad Cj called and apologized later that night so me and him are still friends. Sunday was the same ole same ole. Cleaning and getting all this work done before the end of the day. Which I did now I am getting ready for the 2nd View with everyone hope u guys enjoy it.

UGHHH!!!

2010-09-12T17:45:00.001-07:00

Well this week was better than last I can say that for sure. Last week was terrible. All that drama with CJ and Colby then my dads situation. I hated last week with a passion. This week was better though I am over the whole CJ thing and me and him are friends. I still don't agree with his and Robbie's choices, but everyone makes mistakes I did. I made up with Colby as everyone knows when he came back Tuesday. I gave him his flowers and he loved them. He told me that he missed me and that made my day I smiled again. He was just trying to put me through it for hurting him the way I did. I cant blame him for doing it either. I missed him like crazy and was so good to hold him and kiss him again. Well Wednesday Zac came down and CJ came here late Tuesday night. Well drama came with CJ. He ended up in Robbie's bed and I had told Robbie not to put himself in that position. He did it anyway I was really disappointed in him. Well we started our usual routine on Wednesday with the meeting with Zac and Jinx on the Cam. We learned that we have a trip coming up and we don't know what it is til the day we go. I am super excited to see what Zac has planned for us. I am thinking its a trip to Wet and Wild that would be fun. I really have no idea though. After our meeting me Ben and Zac went to Wal-mart to go do a little shopping. I did my chat that night with Colby in it with me. After my Chat we decided to go out and go to Ybor. We went out only for a short period of time, but during that short period Colby got really drunk. We came back and ended up in the cold pool. I got out and ended up in the bath alone I was kinda upset that he didn't join me. He was having a heart to heart with Robbie apparently about CJ. After that He laid on the couch and I did my best to take care of his sweet self and put him to bed. He had to get up and go to school that morning so Thursday i was off chat so I did mostly nothing. we ended up going out Thursday night like always I had fun cause for once I had someone that could dance almost as good as I could. CJ can dance and is not afraid to get on stage with me. We had fun they all ended up going to Castle but I stayed at The social and dance with my other friends. It was so much fun even though I wished Colby was there. Friday Colby came back other and we spent the day with each other all day. It was nice to just be around him. I want to tell you guys how he makes me feel even though I have only known him a short time. His smile is so sweet and beautiful and he likes me for me. He likes to be around me and even though I hurt him he trust me me still. His jokes and remarks are so funny. I love that he likes to wrestle and get down and dirty. He is just as romantic as me and that's why I am so attracted to him. So as of Saturday night my day had gone really good. Me and Robbie had a blast in his chat and was covered in chocolate syrup dancing. We ended up going out to the club to celebrate his tips he got. While at the club I got a text from Colby saying he was never coming to CBL again because his friends were treating him bad just cause he came here. My heart kinda sunk. I have tried talking him into not caring what others think but I guess that's not going to happen I feel so hurt that I tried to make up with him and got him back in my arms just for him to be ripped away again. It really sucks and I really hate it. I cried in chat today because of it I just can't stand the thought of not getting to see his face and smile anymore. I hoping he may change his mind. I am JUST HOPING FOR IT!!!!!!! =(

What have I done?

2010-09-04T19:51:00.000-07:00

Well this week as been very horrible to say the least. I did somethings I am not proud of and I regret it. Well the week started off just fine after a amzing weekend and week before that. I finally found someone that I might want to date. You all know his name and like him its Colby of course. We had amazing weekend with each other at Ybor for pride. Well during this week Ben had his friend CJ come over. Well while in my chat CJ comes in and starts massaging me and then it turns into kissing from there I end up getting topped by him. Well the sex was not that good cause he was my concerned at what angle the camera was at than pleasing me. Afterwards I felt so guilty even though me and Colby wasn't dating I still felt as if I had just cheated. So as soon as I got clean I called Colby and told him to come over that we needed to talk. He got here and I sat in his car and told him straight up that I had sex with someone else. Well someone had already told Colby this before he even got there, but he wanted to see what I was going to say and if I was going to try and lie which I didn't. Colby was hurt and angry. I was hurting knowing I hurt him like I did. I have always been the one that has been the one hurt never did I think I would be the one that would be hurting someone as amazing as Colby. So I was so depressed that I did it to him. He ended up going home after I told him, but came back and stayed with me. The only reason I still might have a chance with him is because I told him the truth. So after that he came back over on Wednesday. He joined me in chat before he left for Orlando. After He left one member kept picking at me knowing that I was already upset for what I had done that he wanted to fuel the fire. I ended up crying in chat yes I cried in chat. Well Colby hasn't been back since Wednesday he told me that he just needs time to think and be by myself away from me. So as you guys can imagine I am really sad and down for this. Well Thursday Rich took me and Ben to Busch Gardens to ave fun. It was really fun but I didn't have as much fun as I could have if I didn't have Colby on my mind the whole time. Well the Friday was my day off and all I did is Sleep I really didn't want to even get out of bed cause I just feel like a complete fuck up. Saturday just did it for me its like the world wanted to make my last day of the week as sad an d depressing as it could. I got a phone call from my Maw Maw my dads mom and was told my dad was in a wreck and would never walk again. She was just telling me all the things that was going on with him and I just broke down. I thought to myself why me and at that moment I didn't have anyone to comfort me or at least the person that i really wanted to be here with me COLBY. So I cried for like 2 hours. As of right now I am just really Blah and in a dazed state. I hope everything gets better I really can't take much more sad news. Well thats it guys for this week of my life. See you next week. PRAY FOR ME.

OH MAMA NOT TO MUCH!!!!

2010-08-29T18:53:00.000-07:00

This week has been really fun and entertaining. My week started off by going on a second date with a guy named Tonee it was really nice and I enjoyed it. I had Monday and Tuesday off spent Monday night with Tonee. We drank and laugh played board games watched movies it was really fun. We and Tonee cuddle that night, but we didn't do anything I hate to burst your bubble guys lol. He brought me home that after noon where I slept that entire day. Wednesday Zac, Jinx, and Jonathan all came up we had a busy day ahead of us. We had the meeting and we played games. Zac and Jonathan fixed the dryer so it would dry better which meant Jonathan was on the roof. It was so funny watching Jonathan on the roof haha. Later that night jinx invited one of her friends over named Colby. We all started drinking and laughing. It started getting entertaining when Ben was overly drunk. He was just being silly and stupid to say the least. He wanted Jonathan to suck his balls cause of something Jonathan had said previously. Jonathan to this chance to mess with Ben. He had Ben trim his bush and was going to have him soak his nuts in Bleach. Ben wanted Jonathan to suck s his balls so bad he went on about it all night. Well then Matt wanted to get in on the fun so he started leading Ben around on a leash made from his belt LMAO. They made ben try and booty dance which was a hot mess lol. I felt badfor Ben until he started being a little crazy by talking to people in a very bad tone. Well Ben ended up getting emotional and crying and then finally passing out after him and Jonathan started yelling at each other. Well me and Colby started cuddling on the couch then ended up in a candle light bubble bath with soft music. It was so nice and romantic I really enjoyed holding him. after the bath we dryed and went to my bed. We ended up making colby first video which was really funny. colby is a virgin he hasn't had sex with a guy just oral which its so amazing. Colby's personality is stunning he is always smiling which makes me smile and he is sweet and likes me for me.we ended up riding together to the club thursday night but leaving a half hour after we got there cause we really wanted to be alone with each other. we came back to CBL to watch a movie and cuddle on the couch. Ended up making Colby's second video lol. after that we went to sleep colby left for school and my day started we did photoshoots and other things the day before which I think all came out great. Friday ended with me and Colby again cuddling in my bed after having a BBQ at Zac's Tampa apartment. We all went home and got packed and rested for the early trip to Gay Pride In Ybor City. Morning came and everyone was dragging to get things done we left around 10 and the fun began. We got to the hotel checked in and started having our drinks before 8 Jonathan was already Drunk and it was funny has hell. We did the whole Pride expo that was really boring cause there wasn't much to it. Then we went backto the hotel for free time me, Jinx, and Matt went for a dip at the pool. Around 7:30 we all got ready to go eat at Hamburger Mary's which the food and show was amazing, but the service sucked. We headed to Gbar after to dance and party everyone didn't stay put though lol. We ended up going back to the hotel to get ready for the tour of the GAY SPA AND RESORT aka BATHHOUSE. It was really interesting and kinda fun. We got the tour and was told we can come back when we want to later that night. So later after having more drinks Me, Jinx, Robbie, Colby, and Jonathan all went to the bathhouse. we sat in the Hot tub for most the night making fun of everyone, but all in all it was kinda fun. After coming back to the hotel I passed out. we got up today earrly to head back and I naped after I got back thats was about the some of my day here. see you guys next week kiss kiss

Did someone say "SEX"?

2010-08-22T10:51:00.000-07:00

What can I say about this week? Well there was still drama in house with boys, but not as much which I am certainly happy about. However there was a lot of shady actions that I don't approve of. So as you all know Robbie and Ben have been continuing there little sexual encounters which amazingly doesn't affect me anymore at all. I lose interest in people that lie a lot and then play the sweet card to look innocent. So speaking of things I don't approve of I didn't approve of some of the choices Robbie made while he has been talking to Mitch, but that's his business not mine. As for Ben I have lost total interest in him as a sexual sense and maybe even as a good now he is just a friend that I need to watch. Anyways this week started off kinda boring blah, but got better when Zac got here and we got our package from Briefs. We all got a pair of undies and a dance cd which I really enjoyed cause I love dancing as you all know. I got to show my ideas for the chat room which everyone really like them. after the meeting everyone was getting ready for chat and what not we decided to go to Wal-mart and do a little shopping again. Matt made us late for Robbie's chat so he had to do it off backpack cam. So after we got things finished Wednesday and got a little bit of rest we started Thursday We got a Claire and a Stripper Pole in the Chat room that I really enjoy as you have seen lol. Also Claire has reached a new level of bitching at us which I think is funny, but others don't. Claire now not only yells at you, but texts you if you don't do you Daily Happenings LMAO. Anyways Thursday was a little busy cause of us not getting to do our podcast until then before some of us had to do our Chats. I asked Robbie the questions this week which was very fun and interesting. We talked about the drama of the past week and his new Bf from what I hear. We also talked about the advice I gave him that seem to help him a little from help from Mitch. But after all the chats were done everyone besides me was getting ready to go out so I had to get on the ball. we all got into very different styles of clothing but was all going to the club for one purpose or another. Zac goes to have fun with the boys. Robbie wants to spend his last night as a single boy playing with whatever he can find thats cute. Ben goes on a hunt for him some meat at first he was only dancing with girls not just any girls but lesbos lol. Matt goes to see the guy he has been chatting with for a bit which I think is really cool of him. I go to see a guy that I talked to on the net which when I met him he wasn't very social so I moved on. I got to meet my friend from Orlando I love him he is so funny and crazy to be around. I started dancing on the stage where a few others were. Well ended up seeing a guy that I talked to on the net a little bit ago. So we started dancing and then kissing which he kissed amazingly well it was time for him to go so I walked him to his car kissed goodbye. Then walked from the club I was at to the club everyone else bounced to well I was lip locking with my new interest. I danced a little bit more before I realized that Robbiew was walking out the club with another guy I didn't approve of this choice but he is in control of his on life. Then I saw Matt making out with his dude I flip around and caught a glance of ben all over some guy. All the CBL boys ot a little lucky that night. So Friday came Zac still here WOW lol. Me, him, and Matt went out to eat while Ben was in chat and Robbie at his other job. We had fun being silly and crazy. came home and started my chat. Well I have been talking to this new guy since club night Thursday. He is really sweet to me and cute is a understatement. Robbie calls him a whore, but I will make my own opinion of him. Saturday was going to be lame so I slept up til my chat cause I had plans to go with the guy after my chat which I did and it was absolutely amazing. we went to his house and sat with two of his friends laughed drinked and made jokes. I have not laughed so hard in a long time. Then his roomie comes in with a guy and goes to his room and they do the nasty which we can hear. It sounded like they were fixing to come through the wall it was so funny. After sobering up for a hr and making out yes thats right we didn't do nothing but make out. We got in the car and held hands all the way home. I kissed him for like 10 mins goodnight lol. Then came in ate and smoked then hoped in bed where I pasted out. Well little to my surprise I happened to get on the cbl page and see that Matt topped Ben I was a little shocked, but seems I am the only one that hasn't had Ben and it will stay that way cause I am totally turn off by Ben now. Well Zac and Matt went to a concert that I really wanted to go to but had to chat. In the end I am glad I didn't go cause I spent it with something much much better. Well Sunday is here cleaning and diaries are being done. It's a start of a new week so I will you Next Sunday. LOVE YA GUYS <3

Sex, Dramas, and Fun.

2010-08-15T11:11:00.000-07:00

Okay so this week has been really long and drama filled to say the least. The week started out good with all of us getting along great, us meaning Me, Robbie, and Matt. We hung out with each other and was getting ready for the arrival of new CBL Boy Ben. Well Wednesday came and we did alittle extra cleaning for Ben to come home to a nice clean place. I was really excited as you all know that been was coming cause we had been talking about it in chats, podcast, and gossip. Well along with the arrival of Ben, Rich and ex-cbl-M A T T came down as well to spice up our cbl life. We got liquor for the night and everyone started drinking. The got very interesting from that point on with everyone getting drunk and being gay and bitchy us guys started getting heated with one another. Like Ex Matt and new Matt having rude comments to one another as well as Ben and ex Matt. Well as the night went on Me and Robbie got into a text fight cause he was flirting with Ben and attached to him like glue. I was not happy seeing how everyone here knew I had been waiting on him to get here and being drunk didn't help it much. Well on another note ex-Matt likes me and I kinda like him except for his bitchyness and drinking he really is a sweet guy. He was told by my ex roommate Draw that I really like him so he came down thinking that he would have me to himself. Well he was kinda mad or jealous of the fact that I liked Ben and wasn't flirting with him as much. Later that night when everyone went to bed I stayed up for a few talking to ex Matt and he asked could he sleep in my bed because Rich snores to loud, I said yea and as you can imagine we need up having sex. This time I was safe and had fun and didn't feel bad about it. Next day we all was recovering from drinking hanging out and doing our new group photo shoot. We as in Me, Matt, and Ben signed or contracts as well. Later that night we all got ready to go out on our first club night as a cbl group. We had a blast dancing and laughing all that is except ex Matt he didn't feel so good. Its a fun night and i was loving it. we left the club and headed to the traditional Waffle House after club thing. We got tables and laughed with our waitress. A little time went by and we noticed Robbie had been gone for a little to long as I went out to check on him followed by Ben. Robbie was really upset and crying we tried to comfort him as best we could I hated seeing that it was really upsetting. Den mm rich is the one that came to the rescue. We ate our yummy food and headed home to get rest. Robbie end up asking me and Ben to cuddle with him until he fell asleep so we did. They ended up falling asleep and me i went to my own bed. Next day Matt and Rich left and the real DRAMA began. After having a talk with Robbie during my podcast about how it made me feel that he was flirting with Ben knowing how I felt he apparently was making out during my chat time which made everyone in chat turn there attention to them. I was so upset with Robbie that entire night. Later I comforted him about it and was like your doing this in front of me and know I am upset after we just had a chat about it. Well that chat ended up going sour and some of the members wasn't helping it by saying i was upset that Ben liked Robbie more. Well of course I was jealous but thats not what I was upset about I was more upset that I thought Robbie was my friend and we talked about it he wouldn't do it again and he did. It was more of a friend betrayal thats what made me so upset. I was getting so upset that I almost wanted to leave CBL. I had one last conversation with Robbie and we put this behind us and went to bed. Well I ended up in bed with Matt doing things again. Robbie and Ben ended up doing it in the chat room the next day and of course you could imagine I was a little jealous but, not mad or upset cause its just sex thats it. We needed up all being in my first hour of chat dancing and having a great time like nothing had ever happened. after my chat of dancing and old school music with the members I got ready to go out for a night of fun with the guys. We went to G-Bar and started dancing and ended up all going out on our on where i found a gorgeous boy that had been staring at me all night but, living up to my nickname the Venus Fly Trap of Sex I waited til he came up to me to snap my trap LMAO!!!! Well we made out and danced and then I had to leave and didn't get to take him with me which sucked. Well Ben had a bad night cause he feels he isn't hot or something cause all that hits on him are ugly old men and thats it. we comforted him and left him to get rest I felt so bad for Ben i hate when people are upset it was me sad. But thats was my week and trust I hope it doesn't get to much more dramatic than that after this cause thats to much.

A Interesting WeeK!!!

2010-08-08T13:29:00.000-07:00

Ok so alot has happened this past week and I am not sure how it will change CBL hopefully for the good. Well this week started off good with me I was excited that everyone was coming down on Thursday. They came early though and scared me while i was asleep. I woke up to a big black shadow standing over me which was so not funny, but to everyone else my face was priceless. We hung out for a bit and then went swimming early Thursday morning. I got up to go get a hair cut which looks great now. I shopped for a feww things With Jinx and Zac at Wal-Mart. Got new bedding candles for my room and bathroom so I can relax and think better. I love smells.
I loved having Jinx here and the New App Matt is cool. I am sharing a room with Matt thats c to be in the room by myself. I was told I could have Crickets old room, but I want the one with the big tub lol. So Mattie was let go and Robbie was named new Manager. I think Robbie will do great, but I liked Mattie here and it kinda feels weird without him here. I hate that I haven't even heard from him since Wednesday of last week. Wonder if Matt will ever come over anymore I wish he would come hangout with me a little. Anyways my chats have been going great been getting along with all the members well except there is always a few that like to start something its like that everywhere you go I guess. I am still excited about Ben arriving the 11th its going to finally be a full house. More things to do here with more people in the house and not just like 2 because of Robbie's other job.
I have had a pretty good week since it started with the new app being here and me not being alone all day. Playing games and talking having fun its been great.I have gotten to know Matt and he is awesome he is fun to be around and knows how to have a good time. I hope Matt gets to stay here and becomes a new CBL Boy that would be awesome if that happened.
We had a fun day Thursday while everyone was here. We played games and did pod cast. Jinz made breakfest even though it was lunch time. Later me got liquor and had a few drinks before they had to leave. Me, Matt, and Jay hung out the most I love Jay he is really cool and nice I hope he comes down more often.Well after Zac and the others left it got quiet fast lol. I wish they would come down more often. But I have felt kinda down lately for some reason I don't know exactly what its is maybe i miss my ex that I left in NYC . I feel lonely even though i am surrounded by friends sometimes. Its just hard coming from the life I have had.
So on to the weekend of this week it was pretty boring for the most part. I had fun with Robbie and Matt had a few drinks Saturday and hung out. Sunday was a bit more interesting then past Sundays. We had a drink or too played games and decided to go to bed. Later Me and Matt ended up in bed together and did well you. It was nice, but I am feeling horrible about the whole thing its eating me up inside of what we did. I broke rules and I am usually the one who follow a rules really well. Zac wasn't to upset about which is good cause I thought he would be. It hasn't been to awkward afterward which is another plus I would hate it to ruin any of our relationships here.Its going to be a weird and different week this week I might not be my fun happy go lucky self we will see.

My Busy Week

2010-08-01T12:35:00.000-07:00

Ok lets see my first blog was pretty laid back cause of only being here for a short time. Now that i have been here more I can write more about my life in CBL. So lets start with what I have been doing this week. I spent the week actually getting settled in as the new cbl boy which is alot of fun love it here. I started my seasons of Buffy with Robbie and Desperate Housewives with Mattie. I got Mattie Hooked on it. LOL
I have been going swimming more and more which is nice, but I don't like swimming alone so I don't stay in it long. I am waiting for Ben the other new CBL boy coming Aug. 11th so I wont be alone in the House all day when cricket leaves Robbie's at work and Mattie is not here. I been a little down lately since I found out my Grandmother was in the hospital but she is fine from what i have heard. This week as been tiring has hell.
Wednesday I was off of chat and the Tampa house went to Orlando for some fun. We got ready here and when we got there we went to Pulse for a fun night of dancing and drinking. While we were there I got into a dance off twice I won both times cause I am just that good haha. I was so tired by the time we left. I had lots of fun there. I actually saw someone that i was friends with in NYC that has moved here as well which totally shocked me.
We went home after the club got showers and ate food. I didn't know I would be staying up all nigh with no sleep just to go play Paintball in the 100 degree heat. I got to meet 3 new friends that I really had fun with. Paintball was AMAZING it was so much fun to do and i wouldn't mid doing it again. I passed out after I got back to Tampa. LOL I have cooked the last 2 nights I love cooking its fun for me. But hmm that about sums up my week for the most part see u guys next week.

I have arrived.

2010-07-25T18:22:00.000-07:00

Well lets see this is my first written Diary and I am going to try and make it as good as I possibly can. Okay so my week as been very eventful and busy since the day I left CBL for my app week. First let me tell you how that went since I didn't get to do this the first time I was here. I got here last Tuesday around 4 got to me Ben the other app that was leaving. I hung out and chatted with everyone til it was time for my first chat which went really well I might add. after all that We went out for a fun night on the town and it was okay for the most part. the other days were kinda slow and boring seeing how Robbie worked and Cricket isn't as social as most it was just my and Mattie hanging out. Saturday came and it was time for me to leave and I really didn't want to but did. hats kinda how my first week of being a app went.
Sunday the day after I got back I went out and got totally mashed at PH saw bunches of poeple I know and actually talk to. I left the club around 2 and drove back to my friends house and drank a little more. I finally passed out around 5 and was woke up by Mattie calling me telling me to bring all my stuff Thursday I had been excepted. So after resting all day MOnday I had to start getting things ready to leave Thursday. I went shopping for all my must haves like Body wash and Shampoo things of that nature. Wednesday I started packing everything up and having it ready to leave Thursday. Finally Thursday came and I loaded up and headed out to CBL got here around 2. No one was here to greet me at all how rude is that. LOL
Well my first few days as a real CBL boy were fun and entertaining. Robbie bought me a dozen roses and my first bottle of Cotton Candy Vodka. Which we started drinking Thursday night. We ended up playing naked Twister and Wrestling each other naked. Robbie stopped at 7 shots Mattie cheated and took 2 water shots and just 3 Vodka shots which made me end up taking 12 shots. I was drunker than holy hell ended up passes out on the sofa and puking all over myself. I woke up with not to bad a hangover but it was still horrible. I laid around all day Friday because of the drinking I had just did. LOL
Well the last 2 days Saturday and Sunday have been a little more entertaining. I had to start my first half of my photo shoot Saturday. Now I started it at Sam's Club how weird is that but it was funny. After that came how played ps3 a little then it was chat time at 6 by the time i was done with my chat Robbie had made dinner which was so good. Sunday came up quick and I had to get up and do all my cleaning and then finish my photo shoot. Doing my other half of the shoot was so awkward. Posing for Mattie naked not something I like doing haha. So after that I was free to do whatever I wanted after I had done my video Diary that is. Well I hope I did this right this was my first written diary hope you enjoy.