A Interesting WeeK!!!

Ok so alot has happened this past week and I am not sure how it will change CBL hopefully for the good. Well this week started off good with me I was excited that everyone was coming down on Thursday. They came early though and scared me while i was asleep. I woke up to a big black shadow standing over me which was so not funny, but to everyone else my face was priceless. We hung out for a bit and then went swimming early Thursday morning. I got up to go get a hair cut which looks great now. I shopped for a feww things With Jinx and Zac at Wal-Mart. Got new bedding candles for my room and bathroom so I can relax and think better. I love smells.
I loved having Jinx here and the New App Matt is cool. I am sharing a room with Matt thats c to be in the room by myself. I was told I could have Crickets old room, but I want the one with the big tub lol. So Mattie was let go and Robbie was named new Manager. I think Robbie will do great, but I liked Mattie here and it kinda feels weird without him here. I hate that I haven't even heard from him since Wednesday of last week. Wonder if Matt will ever come over anymore I wish he would come hangout with me a little. Anyways my chats have been going great been getting along with all the members well except there is always a few that like to start something its like that everywhere you go I guess. I am still excited about Ben arriving the 11th its going to finally be a full house. More things to do here with more people in the house and not just like 2 because of Robbie's other job.
I have had a pretty good week since it started with the new app being here and me not being alone all day. Playing games and talking having fun its been great.I have gotten to know Matt and he is awesome he is fun to be around and knows how to have a good time. I hope Matt gets to stay here and becomes a new CBL Boy that would be awesome if that happened.
We had a fun day Thursday while everyone was here. We played games and did pod cast. Jinz made breakfest even though it was lunch time. Later me got liquor and had a few drinks before they had to leave. Me, Matt, and Jay hung out the most I love Jay he is really cool and nice I hope he comes down more often.Well after Zac and the others left it got quiet fast lol. I wish they would come down more often. But I have felt kinda down lately for some reason I don't know exactly what its is maybe i miss my ex that I left in NYC . I feel lonely even though i am surrounded by friends sometimes. Its just hard coming from the life I have had.
So on to the weekend of this week it was pretty boring for the most part. I had fun with Robbie and Matt had a few drinks Saturday and hung out. Sunday was a bit more interesting then past Sundays. We had a drink or too played games and decided to go to bed. Later Me and Matt ended up in bed together and did well you. It was nice, but I am feeling horrible about the whole thing its eating me up inside of what we did. I broke rules and I am usually the one who follow a rules really well. Zac wasn't to upset about which is good cause I thought he would be. It hasn't been to awkward afterward which is another plus I would hate it to ruin any of our relationships here.Its going to be a weird and different week this week I might not be my fun happy go lucky self we will see.